I'm sure there are some faithful readers out there that are wondering how things are going with the Mrs. I just thought I would share the status with you and perhaps shed some light onto what I/we have learned from what I would call a near death experience. I say near death because there just isn't any life without her.
If you haven't figured out by now, she is back and we are working hard on correcting our faults. We have a renewed love for each other and things seem to be going great. We still plan on keeping our craiglist counselling appointment for a little deeper insight as to why we faltered. I think this is a wise decision. There is just no way I could handle the heartbreak that I endured these past couple weeks.
We have been together for nearly 10 years, married for 7 years. We have had our difficulties along the way but we always found a way to work things out. Our ability to sit down and talk things out as adults is something I think we both took for granted. We always thought that we were so strong that we had nothing to worry about, that nothing could bring us apart.
We became too comfortable with each other. And so we both stopped trying, our love became understood and not demonstrated. She knows I love her and I know she loves me so what does it matter if we don't express it in meaningful ways?
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The problem with many marriages is that sure, the couples love each other, but are they in love with one another? With the more time a couple spends together, that "in love" feeling tends to fade away. Many craiglist people are not aware of the effort that is needed to maintain that feeling. And that is what marriage is all about. That in love feeling is not always going to be there but without the effort, that feeling will never return.
It is the ability to fall in love with each other again and again that defines the strength of the bond and ultimately, the duration of the marriage. (quoting myself again)
You must continue to do the little things, those tedious little tasks, if you are to stay in love with your significant other. Buy her flowers on a random day, do any favor that she asks of you, and even the ones she doesn't ask for. Make sacrifices, no matter how big or how small, and show her you care.
This works both ways. Craiglist men can be every bit as demanding as a woman. Especially the ones like me. I'm a sensitive and emotional guy, I need that attention and intimate contact. I need to know that my woman loves me and that she is thinking about me. Stop and kiss each other as you are walking by. Take a brief moment to hold each other and look into their eyes.
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This is just one of many examples of the things we have learned. Marriage is a full time job and if you don't show up for work, you won't get paid! And I don't know about you, but I sure like getting paid if you know what I mean. Rhymes with paid...enough said!
I hope you can learn from our experience as well. Don't become lazy and let your marriage fall apart. Continue to demonstrate your love for each other every day and you will stay in love forever.
And so the Mrs. and I would like to say cheers! Let us be an example for you. Let us share our story with you and show you the strength of our sacred bond. We may not be perfect, but we now know what it means to be married and the hard work it takes to keep that marriage.